Wednesday, July 27, 2011

The Saga of Stupid Continues

My neighbors have come back with their full meth fueled force.  That of course means they are thoughtless and half-assedly try to piss me off but get distracted partway through by...meth.  It's a horrible drug, but may work in my favor in this instance.

I've been having minor problems with them lately.  Fat no-neck never leaves her steps because it takes too much effort lady has been letting her dog shit in my yard.  When I asked her to stop, "someone" cut my garden hose and turned the spigot all the way on.  There has been a LOT of parking in my lot.  I talked to a couple of them the other day and they assured me it was the first time, and it would never happen again.

Right.  Because apparently I am as dumb as they are.

Roommate has been sick all week and every time he has left the house, he has come back to cars parked in our spots.  They see him, look scared, and move their cars.  Yesterday, he and girl that stays with us sometimes parked with their cars spread out as faaaaaar as they could, reducing our available parking from 4 spots to 3.  Which one of the neighbors promptly filled.  So, when I got home from work, I had NO choice but to park behind car that does not belong on my property!  I mean really, where did they expect me to go?  A few minutes later, I saw two very confused looking people walk out of fat no-neck lady's apartment.  Roommate and girl ran to the bathroom window to see, and then roommate informed they were at the back door.

I will admit...I went into that conversation with an attitude.  These people could have kicked my ass.  For about 2 minutes until they got distracted by meth.  I told them that the next time they parked in my lot I would have them towed.  And then lost my keys so they had to wait to leave.

Later in the evening, fat no-neck lady once again let her dog shit in my yard.  With me standing at the window staring at her, and BFF standing outside staring at her.  SOOOOOOOO FRUSTRATING!!!!!  I temporarily relieved this stress by taking the dog shit and throwing it back on her sidewalk.  I would like to say that next time, I will put it right outside her door, but I'm just not (really) that type of person.  I don't LIKE being the asshole.  I don't like being the bitch neighbor.

But as I have previously stated, I sure as shit will if I have to.

Talked to a tow truck driver who I will shortly be signing a contract with so that any time someone who I don't know parks there, I can call and have them legally towed.  I will contact their landlord and let him know that if anything happens to my property I will find a way to hold him responsible.  And I will plant bushes on the property line.  Preferably really tall ones that attract bees.

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